Podcast #24 : Speaking with Your Spouse about Money
24, Podcast May 23, 2020
Financial disagreements can increase the chances of divorce by a significant number. If you are having money problems, there may be other issues underlying it.
Some tips to navigate this :
Learn to agree to disagree. You will not 100% agree on all issues with another human being. This is not a problem, this is normal. It is OK to have some different opinions. Having different perspectives does not mean that you do not belong together.
Schedule these talks: Do not bring up the bothersome topic at every chance you get. This will ruin the relationship and your time at hand. Schedule either weekly or monthly meetings to discuss these topics. Outside of this time, enjoy each other’s company. Do not bring up things that will stir trouble, you can make a habit of writing down the thoughts in a journal to discuss at the next meeting.
Talk about their money beliefs. How did their parents handle money? Were there money fights? Were they allowed to spend money as desired or very restricted? And share your beliefs. Our behavior is greatly impacted by our environment.
Come prepared. Bring your budget. Speak about your money mistakes.
Speak about your goals. When would you like to retire? What vacations would you like to take? Do you want to send kids to public or private schools? Do you want to fund their higher education?
Last, but not least, always remember that your spouse is NOT the problem, the problem is the problem. You are trying to work on achieving common goals. Do not blame each other as a person, discuss how the issue at hand might be solved. If one person is over-spending on shoes, clothes, or other items; it may lead to less money for other things as financial independence, vacation budgets, education funds.